Posts Tagged ‘pregnancy’

If you have been following my previous posts, I am continuing with a description of how J.O., my son, came into my life, this is the end of this story.  Read my previous posts to review the story from the beginning.

So another 35  weeks followed. Being pregnant was delightful.  I didn’t really have any of the negative things that can come along with pregnancy and it was pretty much perfect. 

During this time I did address some of the things that I needed to take care of.  I met with the owner of the company I was working for and told her the good news.  I then provided her with my resignation.  I told her I really don’t want to travel.  I had worked too hard in making this baby, and I was not going to take any chances that may jeopardize it.  She understood.  Unexpectedly she said I should stay with the company through the pregnancy and she would assign work to me that could be done from home.  What a wonderful offer.  She was very kind to do this, and of course I took up the offer.

My pregnancy was unremarkable.  We had decided that my sister would be with me during the labor, along with my husband.  We did this, not only because I love my sister, but my husband was running a company and in the middle of my pregnancy  had to go on a trip overseas.  Luckily, he got back home about 2 or 3 weeks before I went into labor.  I spent my time doing all of the typical baby preparation stuff , like decorating the room, reading a lot of books, and having a baby shower.  My co-workers threw the baby shower, but it was not a typical baby shower because they work all over the U.S.  The gifts came via the mail. My sister and mother were with me, and then everyone else joined via teleconference.  In those days we didn’t have Skype or web cams.

Finally one morning in November, I woke up early and it appeared that my water had broken.  I felt fine, no labor pains.  That day I was supposed to be in a teleconference meeting for my job.  I decided I would get through the meeting and then we could go to the hospital.  My co-workers thought it was funny that my labor was starting and I was still participating in the meeting. 

In the afternoon we went to the hospital.  That evening I didn’t get much sleep because I was occasionally having labor pains.  My sister showed up at the hospital at 6:00 in the morning.  My obstetrician came in the morning and started the process of inducing the labor.  It wasn’t long before the labor pains began and soon after they gave me an epidural.  Unfortunately the epidural did not work. At some point while this was goring on I told my sister to tell my husband to go away because I wanted to remain strong and I thought that if he came I would become weak.  She ignored me.  Crazy things can be said when you are in pain.  Later they gave me another epidural, which worked.  The only reason they did this is because there was a shift change with the nurses and the head nurse told the anesthesiologist to give me what I paid for. [Bless that nurse.]  At this point everything was doing what it was supposed except  the baby was a floater and wasn’t crowning.  Finally after almost 18 hours of intense labor, another 8 of less intense labor, and a total of 36 hours since the water had broken, the doctor decided we needed to do a C-section.  Within 30 minutes my son was born.  We cried.  We smiled.

My husband and I gave him his first name, and his fraternal grandmother gave him his middle name, which meant “his father gave him an eagle.”   The funny thing is the day we took the baby home was unusually warm, and as we drove along the river on the way home, three bald eagles were flying along the river.  It was almost as if they knew.

November 19th became a day of miracles for me, my husband and our baby boy. 

As you read this my son is turning 12 years old.  And what an interesting 12 years it has been, but I will save those stories for later.

If you have been following my previous posts, I am continuing with a description of how J.O., my son, came into my life.  Read my previous posts to review the story from the beginning.

I can not really describe our excitement when we had reached this moment.  Probably the best description would be exhilaration.  We were very close to successfully having a baby or babies.  Up to that point in time our situation was considered to be a hopeless dream.  My emotions were already all over the place because of all the injections. Add to that the exhilaration we were feeling at this stage in the IVF process.  It is at this moment that your thoughts begin to describe the current circumstances as being miraculous.

 At this point, the specialist reminds us that this is the critical stage of the process and that we needed to treat it very seriously.  He stressed that we should follow all of the procedures and recommended precautions.  This sounded pretty scary. Our exhilaration quickly changed to somberness (I’m not sure that is a word, but I am sure you understand it.).  It was obvious the jubilation we were feeling was much too early.

After the embryos were transferred to my uterus and after laying flat on my back for an hour or so, the procedure was to continue supplementing my system with progesterone.  The goal of this is to create a good environment for the embryos, which increases the pregnancy chances. Once again this comes with body aches depression, and mood swings.  I couldn’t tell you if they used synthetic progesterone medication or natural progesterone.  One of the risks of synthetic progesterone is the possibility of birth defects.  It is also true that using natural progesterone is not a guarantee for having a child without birth defects.

Besides supplementing my system with progesterone, the specialist recommend:

  • no heavy lifting for 48 hours
  • no strenuous physical activity
  • no tub baths or swimming for 48 hours
  • no douching, tampons or using a bidet
  • no alcohol, smoking or recreational drug use
  • no intercourse and no orgasms (this stays in effect until you can see a fetal heartbeat via ultrasound or you have a negative pregnancy test)

Unless advised otherwise, you can:

  • return to work immediately (assuming it does not require heavy lifting, physical exertion or being submerged in water)
  • engage in light activity (housework, driving, shopping)
  • travel
  • engage in sexual activity other than intercourse for your partner’s pleasure – no orgasms for you! (this stays in effect until you can see a fetal heartbeat via ultrasound or you have a negative pregnancy test)

We were then sent home and the specialist said he would see us again in one month.  At that time he would determine if I was pregnant.  Waiting one month was one of the most stressful times.  Plus there were so many mixed emotions.  You didn’t want to get overly excitement, especially since the percentages of success were not in your favor.  At that time the success ratio for a woman who is 40 years old was 6 to 10% chance.  The odds were not good. 

More to come later . . .

If you have been following my previous posts, I am continuing with a description of how J.O., my son, came into my life.  Read my previous posts to review the story from the beginning.

At the time I had a technology consulting  job in which I did quite a bit of traveling.  We knew that my job was not very conducive to supporting this IVF process.  So, I resigned from my job.  The owner of the company wanted to know why.   I told her that I needed to concentrate on making a baby and my current job would make that difficult.  I told her that making a baby was more important than any job. She convinced me to stay with the company and she assigned me a project that I could do without traveling.  She said we could revisit the decision once the IVF process was successful. 

Lucky me. I could pursue this dream that had many risks, and still not jeopardize my job. If it worked, beautiful. If it didn’t work out, besides experiencing heart-break, we at least had a safety net in regard to our financial situation.

Roadblock three had been removed.  I did not have to quit my job and the job was not going to be an impediment to me making a baby.

More to come later. . .

If you have been following my previous posts,  I am continuing with a description of how J.O., my son, came into my life.  Read my previous posts to review the story from the beginning.  Also, sorry for the brief interlude where I took a little turn off the main road for a moment of passionate opinion.

So, in about a month I ended the consulting project that I had been working on and made an appointment with the specialist, which was in about 2 weeks.  Finally the meeting date came.  I was so anxious.  I was very determined to have a child, but I also did not really know what it meant to do IVF.   In our first meeting with the specialist he introduced himself and said, “So, you are interested in in vitro fertilization?”  I responded, “We are not interested in in vitro fertilization.  We are going to do in vitro fertilization.”  I immediately got his attention and he could see that I was a very determined woman.

In those days, and maybe it is true today, typically there was a hierarchy of steps that you had to go through to address  infertility. Typically you could not just jump in and do IVF.  Other fertility methods had to be tried first.  I am not sure why it was this way or if it is still that way today.  Perhaps it was a convenient way for the health care industry to take advantage of desperate situations and make more money. Cynical?  Not really, just very observant. 

So once the specialist heard about my history of eptopic pregnancies, there was no problem moving straight forward to the discussion of  IVF.  The specialist described, in detail, the entire process and the risks associated with the process.  During this discussion I asked the specialist what were the chances of us accomplishing this.  His response was, “Well, your old and you smoke.”  He continued to explain how age and smoking negatively affect the process.  Well there wasn’t anything I could do about my age.  I had just turned 40 years old two weeks earlier, and there is not much more I can say about that issue.  But his statement about smoking caught my attention.  I quit smoking that very day in that very moment.  I had smoked for over 20 years.  I had tried quitting many times, but it never lasted.  It is funny how circumstances in life can change your motivation to do things.  That concept seems to be a prevailing theme throughout my life.

More to come later. . .

 My husband and I wanted children really bad.  Out of the blue, circumstances kind of fell all into place.  We knew that we needed to rely on medical technology to help us accomplish this.  We were out of time and the old-fashioned way of getting pregnant  was obviously not working.  Coincidently, there were a number of factors that had occurred which made having a baby more of a reality rather than a wish. 

We knew we had to do in vitro fertilization, which was very expensive at the time.  Coincidently, my husband had just accomplished getting our income into an upward swing.  One road block had been removed.  We knew we could afford the procedure.  I should say we knew we could afford to have the procedure at least one time.

We had also just moved to a small town and my husband had developed a friendship with a gentleman whose daughter had just done IVF and ended up having twins.   This gentleman referred us to his daughter’s specialist in a nearby city.   

Road block two had just been removed.  We now had a specialist identified to do the IVF.

More to come later. . .